Insane Venting

I've had one hell of a week and since this is MY blog I'm going to talk about my shit week here.

First, about a year ago? ish...I went up north to a baby shower for family and visited with my great grandma. On the way back down we (my mother, my cousin Jacob and myself) gave a ride to a cousin of mine back down to her place only an hour from where i live. (we were in Luther MI which is 5 hours from Toledo -where i live) Ana, was my cousins name. A few weeks after that she emailed me telling me that she thought i seemed like a cool person and wanted to hang out again sometime. Well, Ana seemed like a big party girl to me. I have two small children so i figured it'd be best not to respond right away because I'm not a party person. A while later i got another email saying pretty much the same thing and that she wanted to hang out sometime. Again i didn't respond. A week or so ago i started thinking about it and had the urge to write back, because its unlike me to be mean like that. and to be completely honest i did like her, i thought she was a nice person. i may not like the 'partying' but shes family...still i just didn't write back.

Ana Died last week.

I may not have been close to her, but damn do i feel the pain of her death. And the guilt. I know people may get angry with me for posting her cause of death but again, this is MY blog... Ana died of an accidental overdose. She had just turned 21.
So, I went to the showing. i couldn't bring my self to go up to the casket. I'm deathly afraid of all things 'ghostly' and/or 'dead people'. I have respect for the dead, but it scares the bajezus out of me. So, i didn't go up. As i was sitting outside with my 90 year old great grandmother, some creaper came up and hit on me...IN FRONT OF MY G-MA AT A FUNERAL HOME! WTF!?
THEN... as everyone is leaving the funeral home for the night Ana's best friend walks straight up to me (i had never met her before) and says, 'You look so much like her it's killin me. Its your eyes, they're just like Ana's.' AGAIN I SAY, WTF!? Not something you want to hear.
The funeral itself was absolutely insane. They dug the grave in front of us, lowered her into the ground and filled it-in front of us-. Which from my understanding is very unusual. Her grandfather weeped insanely and tried to throw himself into the grave. Her brother...was devastated. It was absolutely heartbreaking.

On to another day, I got into an argument with another cousin over...nothing. It was stupid and i hate it. I hate fighting with people. Its pointless. Enough said about that.

And then that brings me to today. This requires back story...can you see the big dream bubble form? Imagine it, its big...SO i have a sister in law. My sister-in-law, We'll call her SIL for short, rented my childhood home from my mother. Which BTW i said was a HORRIBLE idea. just sayin...anyway, My MIL(mother in law) payed her rent for a year as well as her bills. once that year was up, she stopped paying it. SO the SIL couldn't afford the place because she refused to get a job. So my mom evicted her. She had well over 90 days to get her stuff and move out. She waited until the very last day (which was last night) and left. my mother went into the house this morning to find it INFESTED with roaches. like, Joe's friggin appartment infested. There's a hole in the kitchen wall, Front door and back door are broken. Garage man door and overhead door are broken. Hamster bedding and feces and urine dumped in the middle of the bedroom floor. (their water got shut off in may, where did they potty you night ask....EVERYWHERE!) There was dog poo all over the floors, garbage all over the floors, Garbage stuffed into the basement sink with moldy dog poo on top. The carpet was shredded, the padding underneath the carpet was shredded. CRACK PIPES-that's right, plural- and NEEDLES! Wow, what a great SIL i have. I am humiliated. I am Furious. And i can say that i believe i will never forgive her for doing this. What a fucking week, eh? And of course, she fled town as far as we know, So...I'm to the point of being unable to figure out my emotions. I'm numb right now. How can someone live like that? How can someone be THAT disgusting? Its unbelievable.

Well, there ya have it. That's my venting rampage for the evening.

More Ramblings

Hola!
I figured every so often i should come by this page and write something...most days i have nothing interesting to say which is why i neglect my mindless scribblings so much. And today is no different. I have nothing interesting to report really so ill just babble a bit.

Oli and Ani have finally slept together, No, i will not be posting that specific scene just yet because its not the final draft. Ive done a lot of mucking up when it comes to this story because it IS the rough draft and your first draft cant be perfect...which it's taken me a long time to understand that but I'm not attempting to deal with it.

I recently went to see Eclipse. I was one f the Twerds in line at 6pm waiting for the midnight showing on the 29th. And i loved every minute of it and plan to do it again for both parts of Breaking Dawn. The movie itself was amazing. Unlike the Twilight movie, New Moon AND Eclipse blew me away. I'm not the biggest Kstew fan because i think her acting is a bit shoddy but i have to say she is beginning to step it up and is starting to compliment the other actors in the films now. So, Kudos Kstew.

In other news, I haven't read since the first week of May so that i wouldn't be distracted during the writing process. Since i stopped reading i have started and almost finished a story...but lately my mind is getting muddled and I'm having a hard time writing...its not writers block...its the fact that i have the attention span of a flea. So I'm considering picking up a book...or maybe just an Ebook. I've been dying to get my hands on more of Author Stacey Espino's work. Her Fearless Desires book was such an amazing book that i cant wait to read more of her work...which she has recently come out with a new release called 'Saving Grace'. I hear its been #1 on Bookstrand for awhile...Cant wait to read it. SO if your in the ebook world, check her out. You wont be disappointed I promise!

I have also just discovered that there is rumors of Richelle Mead's Vampire Academy series being Optioned for film!!! Which is huge for me...its as big for me as Twilight. Which is...well, Huge for personal reasons. So Yay to Richelle!

Alright, nothing else to ramble about at the moment. I'm going to get back to my scribbling. Later Blogspotters. :)